


I Will Keep You Safe

by mdelpin



Series: Natsu's Fanfics from How Writing Fanfiction Saved Me [3]
Category: Fairy Tail
Genre: FTLGBTales, Fairy Tail Dragon Slayers, Fate & Destiny, M/M, Mates, Reincarnation, Tragic Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-06
Updated: 2018-03-06
Packaged: 2019-03-27 15:20:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,928
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13883619
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mdelpin/pseuds/mdelpin
Summary: Natsu has known from a very young age that Gray is his mate. He confesses to him when they are older and Gray rejects him. He starts to act out in front of Natsu trying to get the Fire Dragon Slayer to give up on him. Although he loves Natsu, he is worried that if he accepts him Natsu will die like every one that he has loved.





	I Will Keep You Safe

**Author's Note:**

> A/N This will eventuallly find it’s way into How Writing Fanfiction Saved Me but I had to get it out of my system. I couldn’t hold on to it anymore.
> 
> Cleaned up and edited 12/03/18

Disclaimer: All Fairy Tail Characters Belong to Hiro Mashima 

Natsu knew that Gray was his mate from the moment he saw him. The second he set eyes on him he felt as though a bolt of lightning had hit his little body. The sensation was precisely the way Igneel had described feeling while meeting his own mate. 

He would always follow that by saying "Of course, she was a lighting dragon so I suppose that was to be expected." before breaking down into the deep rumbling laughs that Natsu loved. 

He wished Igneel was around now to help him know what to do next, but he wasn't, so Natsu had to use whatever smarts and instinct he had developed in his few years on this Earthland. 

He walked right over to Gray and confidently introduced himself flashing him his biggest, brightest smile, trying to ingratiate himself to the boy. He told him all about himself. How he had been brought up by a fire dragon and had recently been abandoned, how he was a fire dragon slayer. The boy looked Natsu over and showed him his opposing magic, sneering at him and immediately challenging him to a fight. 

Natsu complied, seeing it as an opportunity to get to know his mate better, wanting very much to impress this boy who would hold his heart until he died. The fight turned serious quickly as neither boy wanted to lose to the other. 

Gray had been expecting an easy fight. The boy had pink hair for Mavis' sakes. He was mistaken, they matched each other hit for hit until Erza forcibly separated them. Both boys sported huge grins, and Gray found himself hoping that Natsu would join the guild. There were no other boys his age and as much as he liked Cana and Erza he wanted someone he could relate to, someone all his own. He was ecstatic when a week later he saw the red Fairy Tail emblem on Natsu's right shoulder. 

Over the next few years, they would develop a friendship that was not understood by many. They formed a language all their own full of insults and violence, but there were occasional moments of genuine intimacy and tenderness mixed in as well. Although they would never admit it, they were happy together in their own way, neither one acknowledging the place they held in each other's world. 

Natsu did not think that Gray was yet ready to know that he was his mate. He worried about doing the wrong thing and scaring the ice mage away, his instinct told him he needed to wait. There was a niggling itch in his brain that tried to remind him that something terrible could happen if he were rejected, but he cheerfully told it to go to hell because Gray was beautiful and his and they would live their lives out together happily. 

Everything went well until the first time that Natsu got hurt protecting Gray during a job when they were 14 years old. Natsu dashed in front of Gray and took a hit meant for the ice mage. Natsu was in the infirmary recovering for a week, but he did not even seem to feel any pain. When Gray went to visit Natsu in the infirmary, he was greeted with a broad smile. Natsu felt very proud of himself for having protected his mate which was why he felt blindsided when Gray punched him in the stomach and stormed out. He had looked angry, and Natsu could not understand what he had done wrong. 

Gray was a very private person, he didn't usually talk about his childhood to anyone. He'd lost everyone he'd ever loved by the time he was eight years old. His mother, his father and his teacher had all chosen to sacrifice themselves so that he could live, just like Natsu had almost done. 

His selfless actions had shaken Gray to his very core. All week long Gray had been haunted by nightmares where he relived every one of their deaths, except right before they died, they would all turn into Natsu. Gray would wake up in tears having to remind himself that the pink-haired idiot was alive and well. 

Gray made the decision then that the only way he could keep Natsu safe was to let him go. To make Natsu so disgusted with Gray that he would never attempt to sacrifice himself to save Gray ever again. It physically hurt Gray to do this but he knew it was the only way to keep the person he loved the most from what he now considered to be his curse. 

Natsu did not let Gray's outburst in the infirmary keep him down for long. He was determined that now that he had shown that he was capable of protecting his mate it was the right time to tell Gray about his feelings. He was nervous about Gray's reaction when he told him, but Igneel had said that mates were destined so the thought that Gray might not accept him never once crossed his mind. 

Natsu noticed the ice mage had begun to keep his distance soon after he was released from the infirmary, but he just assumed it was a question of pride. Gray liked to fight his own battles, and Natsu had gotten in the way of that. He could understand that. He decided to challenge him to a fight, maybe even let him win to try to get past it. Not in any way that would be obvious of course. Excited by his plan of action he set out in search of his mate. 

He found Gray sitting at the bar, next to Cana. They were sitting very close to each other whispering and giggling, Gray's hand on top of hers. He was leaning into the card mage when Natsu's jealousy took control. No longer content to challenge him to a fight he grabbed an object from a table and hurled it at the ice mage. Unfortunately for him, the object he'd chosen just happened to be a plate containing a piece of strawberry cake belonging to no other than Erza Scarlet. 

"Oi, Ice Block!" Natsu yelled, his voice angry but Gray could hear the underlying hurt in it. "Fight me." 

It took every ounce of self-control he had to not run over and apologize for the pain he knew he was putting Natsu through but he had to do it. Gray wanted to keep Natsu safe, and for that, he needed Natsu to stay away from him. He grabbed a napkin and cleaned himself off. 

"Go away, Natsu." Gray replied coldly, "Can't you see I'm busy right now?" 

He then turned back to Cana and proceeded to ignore Natsu completely. Natsu stood there his rage turning to deep sadness. He didn't even struggle when Erza came for him, wanting to feel the pain that she promised. After she was done, Natsu picked himself up and left the building without a word. He waited until he got home before he allowed the tears to fall. For the first time in his life, his faith in what Igneel had told him was shaken. He allowed himself to wallow for the rest of the day but by the next morning he had worked himself back up to his usual cheerful self. This was just a small obstacle, he could get through it, and everything would get back on track. 

He found Gray by the riverbank skipping stones. 

"I need to talk to you." Natsu began, his heart pounding in his chest. He was so nervous his hands were sweaty, but he carried on. 

Gray raised an eyebrow lazily and stared, waiting to hear what the other had to say. 

"Gray, I know you're mad at me. I'm not sure why, but I'm sorry. You're very important to me, probably the most important person in the whole world." 

Gray scoffed, "Aren't you being a little dramatic?" 

"No, I'm not," Natsu said seriously. "You're my mate, Gray. You're the one person in this world that I am destined to be with. I've known it since the moment we met. That's why I had to protect you, I couldn't stand to see you get hurt if there was something I could do about it. I love you, Gray." 

"Is this supposed to be funny?" Gray stared at him coldly but inside he was panicking. He knew then that Natsu would always choose to sacrifice himself for him, just like the others had, and he couldn't be responsible for that. Not again. 

"Of course not." Natsu said, "I would never joke about this." 

"Well, I'm sorry to break this to you, Flame-Brain," Gray lied, "but I don't believe in destiny, and I don't feel the same way about you." 

He walked away, hating himself for the sobs he heard behind him. In time, Natsu would get over it. 

He was Natsu's mate. The thought made him happy even though they couldn't be together. No matter how much he might want to. He had to keep Natsu safe. So he did the only thing he could do, he gave Natsu some space. 

Natsu decided to go on a solo mission to clear his mind and come up with a new plan to win Gray over. Gray was surprised when he didn't see the Fire Dragon Slayer for a few weeks but figured he had gotten the message and just needed some time to himself. It had been hard for him too, he had felt terrible, but it had to be done. 

When Natsu returned from his job, he was just in time for Gray's birthday party. For once he had put some effort into a present. He'd bought him a necklace with a pendant of a sword. It had a beautiful blue stone inset that was supposed to help boost ice magic. He was very proud of himself for finding it and beyond excited to give it to the ice mage. 

Natsu entered the guild hall and was immediately greeted by all the people he had come to know as family. Gray was nowhere to be found. He used his dragon senses to locate his scent and followed it to the infirmary. Natsu became concerned that Gray had been injured while he was gone, even more so when Natsu heard him making what sounded like pained noises. 

He was too worried to even notice the other smells in the room, not that he would've recognized them anyway. Natsu burst into the room and walked in on Cana giving Gray his birthday present. He threw the wrapped box that contained his gift at the pair and ran off. Gray did not run after him. Instead, he got amazingly drunk, especially when he saw that Natsu had written For My Mate on the card in his messy penmanship. He felt ashamed for letting Cana have his virginity, even worse to have Natsu witness it. There was nothing more for him to do, Gray was sure Natsu was done with him now. He looked at his present and smiled sadly, it was beautiful. He knew he didn't deserve it. 

Time passed, and Natsu's wounds at Gray's betrayal did not heal. He still loved him though, Gray was his mate. The one person destined to be with him forever, except he did not want anything to do with Natsu and the Fire Dragon Slayer couldn't understand why. What had he done wrong? Why didn't Gray want him like he was supposed to? Natsu needed answers but he knew of no other dragon slayers he could ask and he had not seen a dragon since Igneel had disappeared. 

He began to take solo missions exclusively and whenever he wasn't on a job he would go off in search of Igneel, following any lead no matter how small, hoping the dragon could give him the answers he sought. 

Why his fire felt weaker and why his heart always had a pain in it now? It could sometimes be months before he set foot in the guild hall and any time he did it would be cause for wild celebration. Everyone wanted to hear about his jobs, each one more dangerous than the previous one, not understanding that those jobs were as close to a death wish as a dragon could get. He didn't care about the danger, part of him kept hoping he could find someone capable of putting him out of his misery. What good was a dragon whose mate had rejected him? Unfortunately, such an adversary had yet to present itself. Years passed this way. 

Gray watched and worried that maybe his plan had backfired. Natsu kept picking more and more dangerous missions. Each time he would return with severe injuries, but the regenerative ability that seemed to be a part of being a Dragon Slayer seemed to keep him alive. He missed Natsu so much that his heart ached, but what right did he have to say anything? 

He left again before Gray could get the courage to talk to him, this time he was off to Hargeon to follow a lead on Igneel. Gray had started wearing the necklace Natsu had given him for his 15th birthday as a way to feel him close, but he didn't think Natsu even noticed. He never looked at him anymore, and that upset Gray more than he cared to admit. 

Natsu returned from Hargeon with a beautiful celestial wizard named Lucy in tow. She joined the guild, and after years of only solo missions, Natsu created a team just for her. Gray's heart broke to see Natsu move on, but he deserved to be happy. He had no one to blame but himself. 

Soon after, Erza asked for their help on a mission, and they were forced to work together for the first time in years. It was horribly awkward in the beginning, but they found a way to make it work. When they were forced into a team together, neither complained overly much. 

The guild got bigger and more dragon slayers joined their ranks. Gajeel, the Iron Dragon Slayer, came from Phantom Lord, a guild that had declared war on Fairy Tail. Wendy, the Sky Dragon Slayer, came from the guild Cait Shelter. Natsu finally had someone he could ask his questions to, but he no longer wanted to know the answers. It did not matter why, the answers wouldn't change anything. 

Gray had told him he didn't love him and that was the end of it. He had to respect it. There would never be anyone else for him, but he'd just have to take what he could get. They never discussed what had happened with Cana, that relationship had fizzled out long ago, but they found a balance that allowed them to work together peaceably. 

Natsu didn't know that prolonged exposure to a rejecting mate would begin to eat away at both his magic and his life force. He'd been able to head off the effects of the rejection by being away on missions all the time. He started to feel strange, but he didn't make the connection, too happy at being able to be near Gray again to even care. 

The other dragon slayers, however, were watching and they were not happy. Gajeel approached Gray one afternoon while Natsu was off on a mission with Lucy and Wendy. 

"What you're doing to him is cruel, and it's killing him." Gajeel glared at him. 

Gray looked at him puzzled. "What are you talking about?" 

"Don't play stupid with me. I can smell it on you," Gajeel said, "Why would you reject Salamander if you're in love with him? Mates are destined." 

"I don't believe in destiny," Gray scoffed, "and if you must know I'm saving him from himself." 

"Gray, accept him. There might still be time to save him. A mate rights all wrongs," Gajeel pleaded, "If you don't, he will die. There is no other way, His dragon will accept nothing else. He's already started to deteriorate. I'm surprised he's lasted this long. Wendy won't be able to help him for much longer." 

"He's fine," Gray said. He didn't want to have to give Natsu up when he'd just gotten him back. 

"You're killing him," Gajeel said sadly before walking out of the guild. He wanted nothing more than to beat some sense into the arrogant ice prick but the last thing the Salamander needed was to have to come after him for some perceived offense to his mate. Even if Gray had rejected him, he would feel bound to protect him. 

Wendy tried talking to Natsu, she was devastated by the changes she was seeing in him. His magic was becoming unstable, the last few times he had used it his body had been covered in burns. Natsu was having trouble regulating his body temperature as well, more and more she saw him near the guild's fireplace wrapped in a blanket. She'd also noticed on the last few missions that he got tired a lot faster than he used to and every day it got worse. Everyone was beginning to see the changes, everyone except Gray. 

"Natsu, you can't keep doing this to yourself." Wendy spoke gently, trying to soften the blow of her words, "You have to let him go. If you do that you can at least live out a normal life, even if you'll be alone. Leave Fairy Tail, go travel the world. There's so much out there." 

"He'll come around." Natsu smiled at her, "I know he will, Wendy. I just have to wait a little longer." 

"Natsu, please." Wendy looked at the closest thing she had to a brother with pleading eyes, "I'm begging you, think of yourself." 

"You worry too much." Natsu smiled at her and ruffled her hair. He put his arms around her and held her as they sat on a sofa by the guild's fireplace. He promptly fell asleep. Wendy sighed in defeat but couldn't blame him. She had no idea how she would react in his place. Natsu was living out every dragon slayer's biggest nightmare, and it was painful to watch. 

Another week had gone by, and Master Makarov had called for Porlyusica to come and examine him. She performed every test she could think of but could find nothing wrong with him that could be cured by either medicine or healing spells. 

Gray returned from a mission with Juvia to find that Natsu was in the infirmary with Porlyusica. He felt dread as he remembered Gajeel's words and he noticed both Wendy and Gajeel watching him. They got up and made their way upstairs leaving him with nothing to do but head to the bar. 

"What's wrong with the hothead?" Gray asked Mira. 

She looked at him with surprise. "He's been getting weaker, Master thought it was time to call in Porlyusica to check on him." 

"What are you talking about?" Gray asked her confusedly, "Whenever I see him he's all fired up." 

"You can't blame him for not wanting to show weakness in front of his biggest rival." Mira smiled sadly. 

Gray got up and made his way outside. It was early winter, and he loved to walk around in the cold weather. He walked for hours thinking about what Gajeel had said. When Gray returned to the guild, Gramps was sitting at the bar, waiting to talk to him. 

"I had a talk with Gajeel and Wendy this evening." Makarov said softly, "If what they say is true I don't think Natsu has much time left. You might want to resolve any unfinished business you two might have and at least let him go in peace." 

"What are you saying? He was fine just a few days ago." 

"Gray, he hasn't been fine for months. When was the last time he even went on a mission?" 

"No, this wasn't supposed to happen like this." Gray yelled, "I didn't give him up just so that he would die anyway ." 

"Everybody dies at some point, Gray. We don't usually get to pick how." Makarov said, "We've done everything we can for him. You should go see him." 

"How can I even face him after what I did?" Gray cried out, "This is all my fault." 

"Find a way, or I guarantee you will regret it for the rest of your life. He deserves better than that from you." 

Gray nodded and slowly made his way up the stairs, terrified of what he would see. He entered the room and gazed at the man he loved lying on one of the beds. Dear Mavis, Natsu looked so small. How could he not have seen what was happening to him? When was the last time he'd really looked? 

Natsu was almost gone, he was surrounded by everyone he considered family. Gray sat at a chair next to his bed and took Natsu's hand in his. He intertwined their fingers and for the first time noticed how perfectly they fit together. Gajeel and Wendy kicked everyone out and stood guard outside the door wanting them to be able to say their last words in private. 

"Natsu, please don't go." Gray said desperately, "I love you. I've always loved you. " 

Natsu gave him the biggest brightest smile that he was able and Gray could feel his heart breaking, "I love you too, Ice Princess. I never gave up on you." 

"But why? Why didn't you?" 

"Your necklace." Natsu said quietly, "You stripped out of every single piece of clothing you ever wore but you never took the necklace off. You kept me with you always. Even if you never said anything, I knew." 

"I'm so sorry I put you through all this, Natsu" Gray said, "If you'd still have me I'd accept you. Gajeel said a mate rights all wrongs." 

"Gajeel talked to you?" Natsu asked with surprise. 

"He's right, a mate does right all wrongs, but it's too late now. My dragon has already died, I was holding on to say goodbye to you. I'd be honored to be your mate." Natsu squeezed his hand weakly, "It's all I ever wanted." 

Gray broke down then. His cries could be heard outside the door. 

"Hey, it's alright, I have no regrets." Natsu said calmly, "I got to share my life with you. Maybe it wasn't the way I'd hoped, but I wouldn't have traded it for living a longer life alone." 

"This isn't fair, I was trying to keep you from sacrificing yourself for me, and you went and did it anyway," Gray sobbed. 

"We're wasting precious time." Natsu said sadly, "I don't want my last moments with you to be sad. Come lie with me." 

Gray crawled into the bed next to his mate and wrapped his arms around his frail body. Natsu smiled, and Gray kissed his smile. 

"That's better, I'd like more of that." 

Gray kissed him over and over trying to make up for all the time they had lost. 

"I love you, Natsu. I'm so sorry I wasted the time we had together." 

"We'll get it right in our next life." 

Natsu was fading, but he wanted to say it one more time, "I love you, Gray Fullbuster. Droopy eyed bastard." 

"Watch it, squinty eyes!" Gray replied half-heartedly. 

"My Ice Princess…..." 

"Flame-Brain" 

He waited for Natsu's comeback, but there was none. He was gone. Natsu died in Gray's arms, a sweet smile on his face. 


End file.
